Fallout 2 – Let’s Marry an American!

:: The new map of Canada and the USA, featuring Minniwillinois, Tropic of Canada, Baja Canada, and the United States of Texas.

:: Unhappy Democrats Need to Wait to Get Into Canada

:: From The Boston Globe, the new red coloured map of the USA.

:: US Election Results Listed by Average IQ.

:: This is my favorite: Marry an American:

Now that George W. Bush has been officially elected, single, sexy, American liberals – already a threatened species – will be desperate to escape. These lonely, afraid (did we mention really hot?) progressives will need a safe haven. You can help. Open your heart, and your home. Marry an American. Legions of Canadians have already pledged to sacrifice their singlehood to save our southern neighbours from four more years of cowboy conservatism.

Don’t believe it? Check out these pledges:

  • I’d marry an American woman and in a hurry if she was the type of woman I’m looking for, and to show that I am a true and real Canadian, I will take her to Tim Hortons at least once a week for coffee and donuts.
  • Don’t like Bush? You’ll like mine!
  • Marrying a Canadian is like eating poutine. At first, putting cheese curds and gravy on fries may put you off. But trust me, you will quickly learn to enjoy it. No fatties, please. (People from Detroit, I’m looking in your general direction…)
  • Help! CDN fem trapped in US pending greencard approval. Seeking to adopt, er MARRY democratically minded American man to take back to the homeland. Down with warmongering fear perpetuating gun totin’ illiterate idocrity! Mom I’m comin’ home!
  • Not a good time to be on the left in America! Come up north, we’ve got more liberals than we know what to do with!! Must like hockey.
  • I have space for one progressive thinking American woman. I don’t have to stipulate intelligence, the fact that you’re fleeing the evil empire speaks to your good sense.
  • Old Bushy can steal your elections but not your soul. I, on the other hand, offer you mine if it will save a poor american liberal girl from the clutch of religious theocracy, belligerant militarism, and suffocating ignorance.
  • Canucks in the millions marry Yanks achieve dual citizenship scatter themselves throughout the South then elect evil liberal mongerers to the Senate Congress and Penn Ave. Brilliant!

Check Aboot This Site.

:: From Michael Moore’s site: 17 Reasons Not To Slit Your Wrists. (No permanent link, this will probably change tomorrow.)

:: My favorite quote from yesterday’s The Daily Show came from Ed Helms, reporting on Bush’s new agenda for the next for years: “A word of advice, if you want to have gay sex or visit a library, it’s probably your last night to do those things.” While the latter former doesn’t concern me personally, luckily I can visit my library tomorrow, because I work there.

4 Responses to “Fallout 2 – Let’s Marry an American!”

  1. Helen Says:

    I assume you mean “the former” or “the first”, rather than “the latter”?

    Or maybe not?

  2. randy Says:

    Yes, I meant the former. Sometimes it isn’t wise to post late in the evening, when one’s brain isn’t fully functional…

    PS: Not that there’s anything wrong with it, of course.

  3. cindi Says:

    The “Election results by average IQ” page is likely untrue (grain of salt: written by a conservative), but check out this interesting correlation of election results by personal income.

    A sad day indeed. As my grandmother would say, “fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me.”

  4. Murph Says:

    A non-conservative chiming in here with Cindi. The Economist apparently ran with the IQ piece, and then corrected themselves as it turned out to be a hoax.

    D

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